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Date: 2007-04-18 06:09 pm (UTC)Have you read any Laurie R. King? (both her Mary Russell books, and her Kate Martinelli books touch on this particular kind of romance issue.) I adore Gaudy Night and Busman's Honeymoon, in particular, for similar reasons to yours (and Civil Campaign for those but also many other reasons.)
I'm reserving judgment on The Sharing Knife until I see volume 2: knowing that they were originally written as a single volume, I have hopes of further growth and development later. (Which is, actually, generally true of her other work, looking at some of the Miles development arcs, or Cordelia and Aral.)