Oh wow, it's awesome to know someone else had this same issue!
So as not to malign E, I should also say that in general (when she's not tantrumming because MUST DO MYSELF) she is extremely calm, mild-mannered, good-tempered, and patient, and has been ever since she was born (she also clearly gets this from her dad), and she's really probably less work than most, if not all, other kids her age. It's just that -- well, even a toddler who's relatively less work is work, and she doesn't scale -- N of her would be pretty much N times as much work. Whereas her little friend who comes over sometimes? It's about equally as much work taking care of him alone as it is taking care of him and her, because he basically follows her around. (Talking of peer pressure... that kid is going to be SO susceptible to it...)
I looked up Positive Discipline -- surprised I hadn't heard of it -- it sounds awesome, and, heh, not so different (though of course much more thought-out) from the parenting philosophy I've assembled in dribbles trying to keep up with E., as well as my bad experiences with a punitive-parenting method and my knowledge I couldn't do a relative's permissive-parenting method. (Both I and my relative's kids seem to be turning out okay, mind you, but it seems like such a lot of work to get there, and I'm all about minimizing the integrated work :) ) Thanks! I do joke that she's my comeuppance in assuming books know what they're talking about -- because she tends to defy quite a lot of what our more-traditional books say.
And yes, I've been hoping this will mean peer pressure won't be so much of a thing, and extremely pleased to find it was the case for your son. Here's to hoping :)
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Date: 2012-08-06 03:08 pm (UTC)So as not to malign E, I should also say that in general (when she's not tantrumming because MUST DO MYSELF) she is extremely calm, mild-mannered, good-tempered, and patient, and has been ever since she was born (she also clearly gets this from her dad), and she's really probably less work than most, if not all, other kids her age. It's just that -- well, even a toddler who's relatively less work is work, and she doesn't scale -- N of her would be pretty much N times as much work. Whereas her little friend who comes over sometimes? It's about equally as much work taking care of him alone as it is taking care of him and her, because he basically follows her around. (Talking of peer pressure... that kid is going to be SO susceptible to it...)
I looked up Positive Discipline -- surprised I hadn't heard of it -- it sounds awesome, and, heh, not so different (though of course much more thought-out) from the parenting philosophy I've assembled in dribbles trying to keep up with E., as well as my bad experiences with a punitive-parenting method and my knowledge I couldn't do a relative's permissive-parenting method. (Both I and my relative's kids seem to be turning out okay, mind you, but it seems like such a lot of work to get there, and I'm all about minimizing the integrated work :) ) Thanks! I do joke that she's my comeuppance in assuming books know what they're talking about -- because she tends to defy quite a lot of what our more-traditional books say.
And yes, I've been hoping this will mean peer pressure won't be so much of a thing, and extremely pleased to find it was the case for your son. Here's to hoping :)