It's not something I say so bluntly very often, since it's very easy for that to come across wrong. I think you know me well enough by now that it won't. I consider it a healthy relationship, especially since most of the "help" I provide is emotional support, and the fact that we have a close and affectionate relationship is why it helps her, and I do get emotional support in return. So it's not like I'm her caretaker and we scammed the immigration system by getting married. At the same time, it's also really clear to me that if it were just the relationship parts without the problem-solving, we'd be former internet acquaintances from a long-ago fandom, because that's how I swing.
Also see my response to hamsterwoman below, where I speculate about what makes D's response atypical.
I saw! I thought it was very interesting, especially the time part. It seems like he gets some of the same emotional outcomes that I do, but from a radically different mental place.
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Date: 2019-09-18 12:52 am (UTC)It's not something I say so bluntly very often, since it's very easy for that to come across wrong. I think you know me well enough by now that it won't. I consider it a healthy relationship, especially since most of the "help" I provide is emotional support, and the fact that we have a close and affectionate relationship is why it helps her, and I do get emotional support in return. So it's not like I'm her caretaker and we scammed the immigration system by getting married. At the same time, it's also really clear to me that if it were just the relationship parts without the problem-solving, we'd be former internet acquaintances from a long-ago fandom, because that's how I swing.
Also see my response to hamsterwoman below, where I speculate about what makes D's response atypical.
I saw! I thought it was very interesting, especially the time part. It seems like he gets some of the same emotional outcomes that I do, but from a radically different mental place.