Wooow, that's...a lot less surprising than it would be if I hadn't read half a dozen or so memoirs by North Korean refugees in the last couple years. But I haven't read anything by anyone who grew up in South Korea, only people who escaped *to* it. Your father's memoirs sound super interesting. I'm glad you're getting to read them. Are they just for the family, or is he planning to publish? I will buy a copy!
-It is a fricking miracle, actually multiple miracles, that my dad survived until adulthood, and even more miraculous that he turned out mostly functional.
Seriously! That's crazy. I mean, I'm surprised *my* mother turned out as functional as she did, and hers wasn't anywhere near your father's!
(Yes, Frederician fandom, this is another example of therapy-by-memoir. Dad has never been to therapy and never will, but I think writing this all out -- and, probably, equally, seeing his family read it -- has been therapeutic and validating for him.)
I bet. My grandmother did therapy by talking to her daughter, who wasn't really old enough to be her mother's therapist. :/ (My grandmother is one of those "I'm surprised she turned out as *non*functional as she did" cases. Her and my sister.)
Therapy for everyone, yeah.
Therapy for everyone, the mantra of Frederician fandom!
Speaking of which...
(He was basically not given any parental warmth or support -- probably they didn't spank him because they could not have cared less -- he was farmed out to other relatives (in extremely poor living conditions) for years at a time (multiple times), and finally kicked out of the house at age 17. We are all pretty sure they didn't love him at all.)
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Date: 2021-08-18 12:10 am (UTC)-It is a fricking miracle, actually multiple miracles, that my dad survived until adulthood, and even more miraculous that he turned out mostly functional.
Seriously! That's crazy. I mean, I'm surprised *my* mother turned out as functional as she did, and hers wasn't anywhere near your father's!
(Yes, Frederician fandom, this is another example of therapy-by-memoir. Dad has never been to therapy and never will, but I think writing this all out -- and, probably, equally, seeing his family read it -- has been therapeutic and validating for him.)
I bet. My grandmother did therapy by talking to her daughter, who wasn't really old enough to be her mother's therapist. :/ (My grandmother is one of those "I'm surprised she turned out as *non*functional as she did" cases. Her and my sister.)
Therapy for everyone, yeah.
Therapy for everyone, the mantra of Frederician fandom!
Speaking of which...
(He was basically not given any parental warmth or support -- probably they didn't spank him because they could not have cared less -- he was farmed out to other relatives (in extremely poor living conditions) for years at a time (multiple times), and finally kicked out of the house at age 17. We are all pretty sure they didn't love him at all.)
“You told me that you just had a daughter.”
Frederick of Wales says hi.