I think this is in a "best that could be done under the circumstances" manner, not in a "huh, we're similar after all" manner.
I agree, I don't think FW was ever able to see anything but superficialities in his children (in people in general, I suspect). I do wonder what he thought of Heinrich/how much he paid attention enough to perceive his personality and interests, given that Heinrich, who was only 14 when his father died and wasn't under the paternal microscope, was ready to die on the hill of "Dad was the WORST." I mean, part of that is Heinrich's inner terrier meeting Amalie's, but it is interesting.
Meanwhile, the "I have to be a mirror" quote felis gave us from the Duhan correspondance is incredibly self aware on Fritz' part.
While Fritz did have moments of incredible self-awareness, this particular observation strikes me as something that would have been impossible for him to miss. There are people who will instinctively mirror their surroundings, not be aware they're doing it, be really good at it, and be silently dying inside and wondering why. Then there are people who have to be beaten, locked up, and threatened with death to get them to mirror in the first place, they have to make heroic efforts to do it every single time, which lapse the moment they're alone, they're really bad at it, such that Dad knows damn well they're faking, and they're constantly hyper-aware that they're doing this thing that they not only hate, but that goes against the grain so much that they're barely capable of doing it at all.
This quote's been on my radar since before salon, from MacDonogh and at least one of the Fritzian documentaries I watched/skimmed, and has long formed part of my understanding of Fritzian psychology (and fortunately didn't have to be thrown away like most of the Catt material!).
Note also this part of the quote: unfortunately subjected to the sad need to conform to the bizarreness of the objects that present themselves. I read that as him saying that his playacting goes incredibly against the grain.
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Re: Early Education
Date: 2021-01-13 04:06 pm (UTC)I agree, I don't think FW was ever able to see anything but superficialities in his children (in people in general, I suspect). I do wonder what he thought of Heinrich/how much he paid attention enough to perceive his personality and interests, given that Heinrich, who was only 14 when his father died and wasn't under the paternal microscope, was ready to die on the hill of "Dad was the WORST." I mean, part of that is Heinrich's inner terrier meeting Amalie's, but it is interesting.
Meanwhile, the "I have to be a mirror" quote felis gave us from the Duhan correspondance is incredibly self aware on Fritz' part.
While Fritz did have moments of incredible self-awareness, this particular observation strikes me as something that would have been impossible for him to miss. There are people who will instinctively mirror their surroundings, not be aware they're doing it, be really good at it, and be silently dying inside and wondering why. Then there are people who have to be beaten, locked up, and threatened with death to get them to mirror in the first place, they have to make heroic efforts to do it every single time, which lapse the moment they're alone, they're really bad at it, such that Dad knows damn well they're faking, and they're constantly hyper-aware that they're doing this thing that they not only hate, but that goes against the grain so much that they're barely capable of doing it at all.
This quote's been on my radar since before salon, from MacDonogh and at least one of the Fritzian documentaries I watched/skimmed, and has long formed part of my understanding of Fritzian psychology (and fortunately didn't have to be thrown away like most of the Catt material!).
Note also this part of the quote: unfortunately subjected to the sad need to conform to the bizarreness of the objects that present themselves. I read that as him saying that his playacting goes incredibly against the grain.
*hug for Fritz*