So interesting (and kind of frightening) that it began so early -
Yeah, we were pretty shocked -- I knew to expect that sort of thing, but I did not expect it from FIVE YEAR OLDS!
I do feel like that maybe having those early experiences, and having a student body that had more kids who were encouraged to show interests in academics/meaningful extracurriculars, as you say, meant that there was both an impetus and a way to opt out of later drama. I don't know about the boys, but L reports that there is a clique of the more stereotypical high school girls -- but they're a minority and quite easy to avoid, and are not any sort of "force".
And with an Asian group, in particular, academics (and meaningful extracurriculars) are going to be more highly stressed and more important.
For sure. And I know there's a negative side to this, too: my coworkers who live in Silicon Valley talk about how intense the academic pressure is in those schools, how students feel depressed and occasionally suicidal because their 4.0s and 1400 SAT scores are not good enough for the expectations they are setting up for themselves (regardless of if the parents are pressuring them to excel academically). But my own experiences (I went to the same middle school and high school as my kids did) and those of my kids have been entirely positive -- a focus on academics without going overboard.
O's friends group is almost entirely Asian. He is the kind of kid where I would worry about peer pressure -- if his friends jumped off a roof, he'd definitely be tempted! -- but his friends instead are peer pressuring him into things like taking extra AP science classes and keeping up with violin instead of quitting. It's awesome! XD
no subject
Yeah, we were pretty shocked -- I knew to expect that sort of thing, but I did not expect it from FIVE YEAR OLDS!
I do feel like that maybe having those early experiences, and having a student body that had more kids who were encouraged to show interests in academics/meaningful extracurriculars, as you say, meant that there was both an impetus and a way to opt out of later drama. I don't know about the boys, but L reports that there is a clique of the more stereotypical high school girls -- but they're a minority and quite easy to avoid, and are not any sort of "force".
And with an Asian group, in particular, academics (and meaningful extracurriculars) are going to be more highly stressed and more important.
For sure. And I know there's a negative side to this, too: my coworkers who live in Silicon Valley talk about how intense the academic pressure is in those schools, how students feel depressed and occasionally suicidal because their 4.0s and 1400 SAT scores are not good enough for the expectations they are setting up for themselves (regardless of if the parents are pressuring them to excel academically). But my own experiences (I went to the same middle school and high school as my kids did) and those of my kids have been entirely positive -- a focus on academics without going overboard.
O's friends group is almost entirely Asian. He is the kind of kid where I would worry about peer pressure -- if his friends jumped off a roof, he'd definitely be tempted! -- but his friends instead are peer pressuring him into things like taking extra AP science classes and keeping up with violin instead of quitting. It's awesome! XD