tag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240cahncahncahn2018-03-13T05:20:20Ztag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:137466The Stone Sky (Jemisin)2018-03-13T05:17:42Z2018-03-13T05:20:20Zpublic24/5. Okay, I went and read <i>The Stone Sky</i> and it was really extremely good and I was not sure it was possible to follow up <i>Fifth Season</i> with something even more intense (<i>Obelisk Gate</i> was very good, but not, I think, more intense), but in fact it did turn out to be the case. I basically finished this book saying to myself, "Yup, don't even need to read anything else published this year," because I will be shocked if this one doesn't win both the Hugo and the Nebula. (That being said, I have read really not that much published this year, including <i>Provenance</i>, so I should perhaps hedge my bets — and feel free to suggest other possibilities to me :) ) Also, I turned out to be wrong about the second book, which I like a lot more in retrospect, and I thought there was a particular mode of failure in this book (but I might be wrong given that I was wrong about the second book).<br /><br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/137466.html#cutid1">Cut for mild, mostly implied spoilers.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___2" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/137466.html#cutid2">Cut for fairly chunky spoilers.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___2" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=137466" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:136362Le Guin, short stories2018-01-02T04:46:36Z2018-01-02T04:46:36Zpublic12The Wind's Twelve Quarters (5/5), The Birthday of the World (3+/5)<br /><br />This fall I read a lot of Le Guin, again. It's a surprise to no one who reads Le Guin that the content of her books changed dramatically between the 80's and the 00's. And it probably shouldn't have been surprising to me that her style changed dramatically, too — I'd certainly noticed already that writing <i>Tehanu</i> pastiche is a far different exercise than writing <i>Wizard of Earthsea</i> pastiche — but I spent a lot< of time this fall deconstructing and studying her early writing (I really like her later writing too, but I don't love it with the soul-shattering love I have for her earlier writing), and it's so interesting to me to see the distinct progression in style while the core of the writing remains the same.<br /><br />She says it herself in the introduction to "Semley's Necklace" in <i>The Wind's Twelve Quarters</i> (which D insists on calling The Wind's $3) — "The progress of my style has been away from open romanticism, slowly and steadily... It has been a progress. I am still a romantic, no doubt about that, and glad of it, but the candor and simplicity of 'Semley's Necklace' have gradually become something harder, stronger, and more complex."<br /><br />The romanticism, I think, displays itself partially in detail, not necessarily of physical objects or scenes (although she does that too) but also of the way people feel, the way they look at the world; and the way those two things interact. And she is not shy at all, in the first Earthsea trilogy, of sometimes just coming out, as the omniscient narrator, and talking thematically (e.g., when Ged meets the Shadow, light and darkness coming together). And there's correspondingly less interest in what would interest her more later — the sociological/ethnography aspect of it. Oh, the first Earthsea trilogy still is written with a distinct ethnography bent to it — the different cultures and characters-shaped-by-culture in Earthsea are so finely drawn and described — but it's not the focus; and social justice, of course, isn't even on the horizon.<br /><br />Anyway, I read <i>The Wind's Twelve Quarters</i> straight through, which I've never done before (there are a couple of stories I've never actually read, and a couple I haven't revisited for years). It's a really great anthology, I think my favorite Le Guin anthology. While her writing is less romantic in the ending than the beginning, even the closing stories in the book are still very graceful and lovely.<br /><br />I also read <i>Five Ways to Forgiveness</i>, which is a… very different book. It's -- how did she put it -- harder, stronger, more complex. I remember I'd tried to read some of these stories before, without success. I think I probably was about 10-20 years behind Le Guin in thinking about social justice, for starters, and also I was just too young in general. The stories in <i>Forgiveness</i> are adult stories. I didn't have the emotional context to understand "The Matter of Seggri" until now, I think, or to grasp the horror of it (it's really kind of a horror story at heart) and what it means about us. <br /><br />But both books are <i>true</i>, I think, in the way that great writing is true, in that it strikes to the heart of what it means to be human, how we live in this world. Different parts of the truth, but both truth nevertheless, and that is part of what makes Le Guin a great writer.<br /><br />The other part, of course, is that her writing is more than half poetry. Her early work is a rounder (sorry, I don't know how else to put it), more beautiful poetry, while her later work is harder and more sharp-edged, but both are just really good. It's all wonderful to read aloud. (Which is a problem for me, in terms of pastiche, because when I write I don't really think about it orally!)<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=136362" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:135188Seventeen Against the Dealer (Voigt, reread)2017-10-20T01:23:34Z2017-10-20T01:29:38Zpublic9I was going to wait until I had time to go into <i>Seventeen</i> and get the textual backup for everything I'm saying, but I have gradually come to realize that if I wait until then it will never happen <s>until possibly after Yuletide which isn't acceptable</s>. Also I guess it would be even longer than it actually is. So. Here you go.<br /><br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/135188.html#cutid1">This is long even without quotations.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=135188" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:134968Sons from Afar (Voigt)2017-10-03T04:51:24Z2017-10-03T04:51:24Zpublic1I am gonna finish this sequence. Someday. I really am. :)<br /><br />This book, I think, has two different themes. <span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/134968.html#cutid1">This time I remembered to cut for length.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=134968" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:134738Come a Stranger (Voigt)2017-09-25T04:45:56Z2017-10-03T04:52:02Zpublic2<i>Come a Stranger</i> is the most positive book in the Tillerman Cycle (which, in a series that takes on abandonment, death, failure, racism, and emotional abuse of a couple different kinds, is maybe not saying a whole lot, although the themes of all the books involve growth and compassion and optimism and healing so that I never really noticed until this read-through how <i>relentless</i> they are) — this is the book about a family that works from the very beginning, and with themes that involve an existing strength, and growth mediated by that strength (as opposed to, say, <i>Dicey's Song</i> and <i>Solitary Blue</i>, which are about fractured family that has to figure out how to work, and growth from what started as dysfunctionality). <br /><br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/134738.html#cutid1">Cut for length.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=134738" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:134577The Runner (Voigt)2017-08-10T04:50:19Z2017-08-13T03:32:08Zpublic11Oh man, this is a dense book. So many things going on in this one.<br /><br />One thing I admire so much about all the Tillerman books is the way that the characters are so complex and rfull that they all stand alone. You could read this book without knowing one other bit about the Tillerman family, and it would still be a great book. But it's also in some ways the central book of this series — it shows you where everything else came from.<br /><br />Theme and motif: several things going on here, at the same time. <span style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/profile'><img src='https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png' alt='[personal profile] ' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: text-bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/'><b>mildred_of_midgard</b></a></span> pointed out the breaking and building motif. Bullet is a breaker; he doesn't build; Patrice also tells him he's not a builder. His brother John is a builder, John says. And Bullet shoots OD, and isn't able to rescue his mother… It's a hard book. But… Bullet, of all three of the Tillerman children of that generation, comes to a point where he accepts his life, which it's not clear the other two have done (they certainly had not come to that point when they left the Tillerman family). <br /><br />There's also a pronounced racism arc, which interestingly carries over in a big way into <i>Stranger</i>, although it's a completely different thing in <i>Stranger</i>, of course.<br /><br />There's also a boat again, in a confluence of boat and gift — Patrice makes Bullet a boat, as a gift (Bullet pays him for it, but it really is a gift), and Bullet gives it to Abigail — and that boat gives her a way to separate from her husband (I mean, not literally, more's the pity, but at least to manage that relationship with slightly more grace).<br /><br />There's no music in this book, except square dancing from the jukebox (which is a very temporary and superficial form of connection, though connection nevertheless), and Bullet's and Abigail's memories of Liza singing, which connect them to her memory and really nothing else (well, maybe Bullet and Abigail to a certain extent). His father has squelched all the music — that which, in this cycle, makes family and found family.<br /><br />I guess, maybe, the theme is growing up? Identity? This is the only book so far where I feel like it's hard for me to get a handle on it, because it's a book that I think generally sort of defies description. Like Bullet himself. He's described as being alone and separate, a man of bronze, a hero who just happens to be underage at the time. But he's also written as having a really finely-tuned sense of other people in a lot of ways, although completely oblivious and/or flat-out offensive in a lot of other ways. Of course, most people are a combination of those two things (especially in adolescence), but not to the extremes that Bullet's written — quite frankly most of the scenes with Bullet and Abigail in them just completely baffle me, because they understand each other's laconic words and I have no idea what they're talking about. (Please enlighten me! What does Abigail mean when she says Bullet used to have a good sense of humor? What does Bullet mean when Tommy says he thought better of Bullet, and Bullet says, "No, you didn't"? I <i>think</i> the former is just that Bullet hasn't yet had the idea of cooking breakfast for Abigail — and I think the latter is Tommy thinking everyone is just like him, and therefore he didn't think better of Bullet — but I don't <i>know</i>.) <br /><br />Bullet thinks a lot about boxes, the way we box ourselves in, and his epiphany at the end is that we all are going to have boxes, we just get to choose whether we have boxes that we're comfortable with or not. I think maybe the book really is about the way we choose what limitations we work with, and what we do within those limitations.<br /><br />But really I don't really know what the book is about. It's about the Vietnam War and the way the fear of the draft permeates everything; it's about race relations (or the lack thereof); it's about running cross-country; it's about how authority perpetuates itself; it's about a kid from an emotionally abusive family who is himself kind of violent; it's about all those things but it's not really about any of them.<br /><br />Also, wikipedia tells me that in <i>Homecoming</i> James (who Liza was pregnant with, last Frank had heard — about a year ago) is 10 and Maybeth is 9. So you <i>know</i> what happened is that as a result of seeing Bullet in this book ("Frank's mouth drooped down a little at the ends. 'If I had the fare, I'd go up there right now, tonight; I could use a dose of Liza.'" And on the next page: "'I wonder if… do you think Honey'd give me the money to get to Boston?'"), Francis went away and went to visit Liza, who had just had James a couple of months previously, and Maybeth was the result. I… did not realize it was possible to hate him more than I already did, but IN FACT IT IS. Although violence is not my thing I… am kind of cheering Bullet on when he wrecks Honey's car (although to be fair it isn't at all Honey's fault. But still). (ETA 8-12: Um. Yeah. That really sounds like I think violence against innocent people is totally okay... which no. I should have said that I feel a lot of empathy for Bullet, and I do, but "cheering" is a bit much, yeah. Thanks mildred.)<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=134577" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:134224Homecoming (Voigt)2017-08-04T04:46:11Z2017-08-04T04:46:11Zpublic23+/5. So I read Homecoming! FINALLY. It only took, like, seven tries??<br /><br />I had thought that it set off my abandonment and rejection squicks, and I think it does, some, although the rejection squick is actually pretty mild here, as it's Dicey that rejects Eunice more than the other way around. No, it's something else, as I realized around chapter 2 (this is the first time I've read it carefully paying attention to my own emotional reactions). It's this paralyzing fear I have of not being good enough for my family, the fear of failing them, that through my not being good enough horrible things will happen and it will be all my fault — and — I mean, this is definitely a child fear. I don't feel like that as an adult much — I mean, don't get me wrong, I expect I have my fair share of mommy guilt, but by and large I am really pretty OK with the imperfect balance I'm making of things. (When I am in emotional or physical crisis or panic mode, which thankfully has been a very rare and as-these-things-go-mild occurrence, these issues do come out more.) But <i>man</i> does this book bring everything out. Momma leaves their family, I am convinced, for exactly that reason. Dicey is less prone than just about anyone else in the world to that sort of fear, but it's a natural consequence of the situation she's in. I mean, she's facing these impossible odds and if she does fail, the brunt of the failure comes down on her siblings. AGH. (It was hard for me even to type that.) Interestingly, "disaster" books that are similar in that the protagonist strikes out against terrible odds, but the potential consequences fall on the protagonist alone (I'm looking at you, <i>Hatchet</i>) don't bother me at all, it's specifically the letting down family part that gets to me.<br /><br />(I had to read the end first, to make sure they made it okay — obviously they did, but I had to remind myself viscerally. After about a chapter, I also then had to read the middle with Eunice, to steel myself for it — and like I said, it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought I remembered. Then I was mostly all right — I think also that reading <i>Solitary</i> right before this steeled me a little, because I'm able to maintain some distance from what Melody does, and I was able to kind of carry that over into this book.)<br /><br />Anyway, so I read it and it was (of course) amazing and there are things that are really cool re-echoed throughout the series. I will say that it does have a bit of first-book-in-a-series feel to me; reading it after all the other books, instead of before, I feel that she had only 80% worked out what was going to be in the other books (occasionally there was something I blinked at, like Millie saying they don't bother Abigail — I suspect Voigt would have written that slightly differently if she'd written it after Dicey's Song) instead of, like, 99%, but even that — well, you see that by working from the other books I'm working from an impossibly high standard.<br /><br />This one's theme is really easy. Home. It's even in the title. What is it, who is it, how do you get there, how do you find it, how do you make it. Home not only for the Tillerman children, but for Gram. For Gram, there are two different homes, of course: the home she made for herself, all by herself, after her husband died.(*) And there's the home that she didn't want, or at least told herself she didn't want, but got anyway, the home with four children in it, the home that is also (and finally, at long last) a family.<br /><br />In this book, there's a red sweater, which <span style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/profile'><img src='https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png' alt='[personal profile] ' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: text-bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/'><b>mildred_of_midgard</b></a></span> had previously pointed out to me (in <i>Runner</i>) as Bullet's. (I don't think it's the identical sweater in <i>Runner</i>, since Liza was long gone by that time, but we know Bullet's favorite color is red, and he probably had several red sweaters.) It's a man's sweater with holes in it, it's what Momma was wearing when she left them (as described by Dicey later). I… don't know how it makes me feel if I think that Liza was thinking about Bullet when she left her family.<br /><br />Mildred also pointed out to me that the second half of the book mirrors the first, and it's the sort of thing I probably wouldn't have noticed if it hadn't been pointed out to me, but it really does. It's interesting to me not only how Eunice and Gram are mirrored, but also how Will and Claire are mirrored by Windy and Stewart; both sets of people rescue them and are helpful in getting them to their destination, but the latter… don't care about them, really, and one might expect that once you helped a set of four kids you might come back later and see if they were actually doing OK. As Will and Claire do.<br /><br />Okay, I'm sure there's lots of other stuff I was going to talk about, but I can't find my copy right now, so it will have to wait.<br /><br />(*) also, by the way, the chronology is finally falling into place for me! In Runner, James has probably just been born or is about to be born (Frank says that in the last letter he got, Liza said she thought she was pregnant again, and I totally could see at least half a year going by since then). In Homecoming, he's 10 — so Homecoming takes place ten, at most eleven years after <i>Runner</i>. (Also, I always thought of Gram as being really old — I think because of the name Gram — but she must not be any older than 60 in Dicey's Song, and very likely in her 50's.) Grandfather Tillerman died 4 years before Homecoming, so — oh geez — that means six years, at least, of the two of them alone. Without any children. Without even a <i>phone</i>. And maybe on the whole it's a relief to Abigail, because no children means no hostages, but… still. STILL.<br /><br />…gosh, can you imagine <i>Homecoming</i> if the grandfather were still alive. Actually, let's not.<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=134224" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:133987A Solitary Blue2017-07-13T13:42:56Z2017-07-13T13:42:56Zpublic11The more <span style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/profile'><img src='https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png' alt='[personal profile] ' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: text-bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/'><b>mildred_of_midgard</b></a></span> and I are diving into these books, the more I am impressed by them. They work on so many levels — the immediate visceral level, the depth of character level, but also the amount of cross-referencing and deep theme repeating and reflecting among the books is frankly scary. Some of it I'd seen before, and some of it I never really registered because they're so good on the other levels. I don't know any other books quite like these (and if you do, I definitely want to know about it).<br /><br /><span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/133987.html#cutid1">Cut for length.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=133987" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:133680Dicey's Song (Voigt)2017-07-02T04:48:35Z2017-07-02T04:48:48Zpublic9Nth reread. I have posts on <i>Thick as Thieves</i>, <i>All the Birds in the Sky</i>, and <i>Carry On, Mr. Bowditch</i> in the queue, but then <span style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/profile'><img src='https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png' alt='[personal profile] ' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: text-bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/'><b>mildred_of_midgard</b></a></span> found several interesting cross-references between <i>The Runner</i> and <i>Seventeen Against the Dealer</i> (thank you for telling me about these!) and one thing led to another and now I'm in the throes of a massive Tillerman reread. Maybe I'll even get through <i>Homecoming</i> this time, although so far it's not looking promising… I have a plan, though!<br /><br />In my reading <i>Dicey's Song</i> this time around, the theme of holding on and letting go is even more explicitly prominent <a href="http://cahn.dreamwidth.org/89699.html">than I remembered</a> — but, you know, now that I think about it, this theme echoes and re-echoes throughout the cycle. In <i>Runner</i>, in <i>Come a Stranger</i>, in <i>Sons from Afar</i>… all of the books, I think, really, are about letting go of the things you have to, and holding on to the things you love, and how those things are tangled up together and sometimes are the same thing.<br /><br />And I noticed on my last reread that the cycle's overarching theme (or one of them) is family, and this book is about the family that figures itself out, how it figures itself out, and is the one most explicitly <i>about</i> what it means to be a family.<br /><br />I think this book is in many ways the thesis statement for the entire cycle.<br /><br />And oh my goodness the resonances… I think Voigt must have had all these characters fully realized in her head from the very beginning. Jeff cites his father quoting Tolstoy about how unhappy families are all unhappy in their own way… setting up <i>that</i> exploration of family. And the Chesapeake Bay, which is its own character who really comes into its own in <i>Solitary Blue</i>. And the farm, which emerges as a character (as <span style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/profile'><img src='https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png' alt='[personal profile] ' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: text-bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='https://mildred-of-midgard.dreamwidth.org/'><b>mildred_of_midgard</b></a></span> noted). <br /><br />And boats and music, both as motifs and representative of… what is the boat representative of? Freedom? Independence? Connection? I think all those things at one time or another. Boats are… a really big deal in this cycle. I think <i>every book</i> has a boat playing a somewhat central role. Oh no, wait, not <i>Come a Stranger</i>, I think? Which may mean something as well... Anyway. This book begins with Dicey sinking a boat (…Bullet's old boat, right? So it's its own character too?), then the rest of the book involves her working on it, and what it means that she's able to or not able to work on it. Interestingly, where Dicey is concerned it seems to be the process that symbolizes to us what's going on, not the result (as it might be in the hands of another writer). Dicey doesn't finish the boat, and that means something because the reason she doesn't finish it is because she' busy holding on. (HM. Bullet finished his boat. He was letting go, and not holding on to anything. HMM. <i>Runner</i> is probably the key to this whole cycle.) And then there's the failure in <i>Seventeen</i>… I think it will be much more interesting to look at that, this time out.<br /><br />I don't know what music means exactly in these books, except that it's a way throughout the cycle that people are drawn together, that people in these books strengthen families and create found families. Interestingly… I think (?) the only book devoid of music entirely is <i>The Runner</i>, and even that one has poetry as a way to (sort of) connect. <br /><br />And other things… Gram gets a phone. The same phone she threw at the phone company in <i>Runner</i>, when she became for all intents and purposes alone, and liked it that way (well, I guess, at least after her husband died; I don't imagine it was very comfortable until then, but from what she says in this book, she might have found her own meaning in that as well). She gets it explicitly <i>because she has children in the house</i>. So the phone, itself a means of communication, becomes representative of Gram's willingness to communicate, her connection, her reaching out. <br /><br />(Geez, I want more fic about Gram. She learned all these lessons, slowly and painfully, that she's telling to Dicey in this book. What was it <i>like</i> for her?)<br /><br />And the scene in the wood shop never fails to break me down. I'm just always a crying mess after reading that one.<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=133680" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> commentstag:dreamwidth.org,2010-04-30:507240:133388Harmony (Parkhurst)2017-05-20T03:15:43Z2017-05-21T21:26:41Zpublic23+/5. This book was really painful for me to read, because it was so emotionally accurate. It's about a family with a daughter Tilly on the autism spectrum, variant PDD-NOS, Asperger's-like. Tilly is, I think, in 7th grade? She is exceptionally intelligent and also has an exceptional amount of information about her chosen topics (statues). She also has severe meltdowns, often in public, some for which the cause isn't necessarily known. She appears to have some sensory processing issues. She has a lot of social difficulty, including sexually explicit speech and using extremely derogatory terms (e.g., bitch) to describe everyone around her. She is kicked out of several schools, the last being a special-ed school for children like her. At the time of the book, she is being homeschooled, but even that is fraught. Her parents uproot their family to be part of a camp for special-needs children like Tilly, led by a charismatic child-advice guru who might or might not be the answer to their hopes.<br /><br />Most of the book is from the perspective of Iris (Tilly's younger neurotypical sister) and Alexandra (the mother). Iris loves her sister, even often likes her; is ashamed of her sometimes, struggles with the sacrifices her family has to make for her sister. Alexandra bears a crushing weight of… everything, of feeling like a failure for Tilly's failures, of anxiety about what her child will become and what her life is going to be like.<br /><br />And it was like reading about a dark mirror of my own life. <span class="cut-wrapper"><span style="display: none;" id="span-cuttag___1" class="cuttag"></span><b class="cut-open">( </b><b class="cut-text"><a href="https://cahn.dreamwidth.org/133388.html#cutid1">Cut.</a></b><b class="cut-close"> )</b></span><div style="display: none;" id="div-cuttag___1" aria-live="assertive"></div><br /><br />Anyway. The only thing about it was that the descriptions were really stunning, the characterization and writing were great, but I felt like the ending was a little… abrupt, and it didn't quite deliver on the answers to all the hard emotional questions it was asking.<br /><br />(edited 5-21-17 for wrong author, oops)<br /><br /><img src="https://www.dreamwidth.org/tools/commentcount?user=cahn&ditemid=133388" width="30" height="12" alt="comment count unavailable" style="vertical-align: middle;"/> comments